what she listened to:
singles only by clothes make the man, young bride by midlake, ice water by catpower & owen pallettwhats she read:
the last lonely saturday by jordan crane,mondo boxo by roz chast & women by r.crumbwhat she ate:
soup, soup & french fries wishing it was soup
oct 2007//
it's so exciting to search and sift out some new gem of forgotten old music-the exotic yet hauntingly familiar strains touching some deep chord in the brain.
really, it truly is.
but to look through the standardized case of a new class of humans, is just. well, not as fun. in fact, i hate meeting new people. and getting acquainted with them is just the worst part of all. Normally, i seize the opportunity, any opportunity at that, to meet a stranger. At that prospect, im a little kid, and the world is my candy store (im so tired of cliches).
(As i am tired of these valley speaking, high-end fashion wannabe retards that think they are 'it' once they have fucked over 20 guys.)
it's not a race girls, NOT A RACE.
ive decided to grow a beard, and male genitalia.
really, it truly is.
but to look through the standardized case of a new class of humans, is just. well, not as fun. in fact, i hate meeting new people. and getting acquainted with them is just the worst part of all. Normally, i seize the opportunity, any opportunity at that, to meet a stranger. At that prospect, im a little kid, and the world is my candy store (im so tired of cliches).
(As i am tired of these valley speaking, high-end fashion wannabe retards that think they are 'it' once they have fucked over 20 guys.)
it's not a race girls, NOT A RACE.
ive decided to grow a beard, and male genitalia.
-------------------
nov 2007//
ive been doing some serious thinking.
maybe not as serious as you would.
but ive been dwelling on life and things surrounding it.
ive got it good.
the bad part is making up my mind.
who i need and what i want. thats never easy. ive decided to keep the old and maybe some of the new, just a couple of pieces here and there. like how i still eat soup but ive changed my beverage choice. okay, thats a terrible example. but how can one express it?
ive been staring at this picture off of the back of this doritos bag. Alexander Lin, a 13 year old with the facial structure of a 40 year old. how dull and how depressing is that. The dyke apparently invented some sort of electronic waste system, he saw how so much electronic devices were trashed and polluting our earth, and now he collects these things, up to 80,000 pounds of it. what does he do with it? somehow he managed not to destroy our planet one spec less and now is making a landfill somewhere on the moon. wow. how honorable. i bet when he dies and meets all the young dead artists, and they ask how he died, he'll say "the moon crashed down onto the earth creating a huge explosion, i collect electronics so the reaction was greater dealt upon my house, i died eating shit basically".
i met someone today, who doesnt dream. how awful is that.
i go to sleep just to dream, its where i feel i can imagine he crumbing walls of childhood and become who i really am without holding back. i cant imagine a life without dreams.
really.
i currently got a job to draw comic strips for the university's newspaper. how lucky of me.
weeping willow wont you wallow louder?
maybe not as serious as you would.
but ive been dwelling on life and things surrounding it.
ive got it good.
the bad part is making up my mind.
who i need and what i want. thats never easy. ive decided to keep the old and maybe some of the new, just a couple of pieces here and there. like how i still eat soup but ive changed my beverage choice. okay, thats a terrible example. but how can one express it?
ive been staring at this picture off of the back of this doritos bag. Alexander Lin, a 13 year old with the facial structure of a 40 year old. how dull and how depressing is that. The dyke apparently invented some sort of electronic waste system, he saw how so much electronic devices were trashed and polluting our earth, and now he collects these things, up to 80,000 pounds of it. what does he do with it? somehow he managed not to destroy our planet one spec less and now is making a landfill somewhere on the moon. wow. how honorable. i bet when he dies and meets all the young dead artists, and they ask how he died, he'll say "the moon crashed down onto the earth creating a huge explosion, i collect electronics so the reaction was greater dealt upon my house, i died eating shit basically".
i met someone today, who doesnt dream. how awful is that.
i go to sleep just to dream, its where i feel i can imagine he crumbing walls of childhood and become who i really am without holding back. i cant imagine a life without dreams.
really.
i currently got a job to draw comic strips for the university's newspaper. how lucky of me.
weeping willow wont you wallow louder?
--------------
dec 2007//
ive decided; to be myself is to be this creepy sad, wallowing type figure lying on her bed like a heap of nothingness. thats all i do. at least thats what everyone says i do. stay in bed, sleep all day. eat constantly. hibernation does lead to eating though. its not my fault im fat.hah.
the internet bores me. social communication bores me. dancing and singing out loud bores me. being with you bores me. im boring.
they ask me to hang out with them yet i feel so excluded, they talk to me but im not there. theres no point in being friends with someone you cant be yourself around. why adjust my personality in order to fit in and have "fun". its bullshit. everything ia bullshit. i dont wanna have fun. i just wanna sit on the curb and think to myself.
'wow this is great, we're doing nothing but it feels like everything to me.'
THIS GIRL, THIS GIRL IS NEVER HAPPY.
